High on Math

6 06 2011

I have friends that like to run.  I hear them talk about a marathon they’re training for or some 5k run they are preparing for.  I see them on the side of the road, running in the rain.  I respect that.  They say running releases endorphins that are addicting and gives you a feeling of being high.  I suppose it’s also healthy for you.

I’ve never gotten high from running, just out of breath, but I think I understand what drives people like that.  It’s like me and math.  There’s a reason I became an engineer.  I get my high from math.  I call it MATHamphetamines.  I admit it, I’m a math junkie.  And I don’t just mean addition or multiplication or even differential equations.  I like making spreadsheets.  I like figuring out how much money I make per second in my head.  I like calculating out what percentage of my life I’ve lived in different towns.

Sick, I know.

Hi, my name is Mr. Pold and I’m a nerd.

I thought about getting into the 12-step program offered by nerds anonymous, but I couldn’t get past number 4.  These were the steps:

1. Admit that you are a nerd.

2. Believe that in order to raise a power to a power you multiply the exponents

3. Make a decision to use mathematics for good reasons not just because you’re bored

4. Make a spreadsheet of all the nerdy stuff you do that is a waste of time

5. Admit that Star Trek is just a television show and the Federation doesn’t exist (yet)

6. Be entirely ready to stop quoting Star Wars and Holy Grail constantly

7. Resist the urge to point out every flaw in every movie that gets the science wrong

8. Stop referring to William Shatner as “Bill” as if you’re friends

9. When you have profound thoughts about string theory or gravitational contraction, keep them to yourself

10. Promptly admit when you’re wrong even though you’re positive that you’re right

11. It isn’t clever to take idioms literally.  Just stop it.

12. Comb your hair, it’s cool that you admire Einstein, but seriously…

The steps just started to get really personal toward the end and I couldn’t see myself being able to do it.  I need my nerdiness!  Bill would understand.

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3 responses

6 06 2011
Mary W.

Um, I’ve had long tirades about BOTH string theory AND gravitational contraction on facebook. Does the supposed coolness of facebook erase the nerdiness of the subject matter?

8 06 2011
Trudy Mitchell Montgomery

: )

1 11 2011
Ryan

I’m also a nerd. Maybe we should work on the steps together? This is my fav blog post so far.

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